Transition

I stood in the shower today, far longer than two minutes, and let the water rush around me. My thoughts almost as many as the drops of water flowing over me. Thoughts running faster than I can process. It seems I have traveled the world and back, which I have, but daily my thoughts travel millions of miles in an attempt to process everything. I was in Africa… I really was… It was only 3.5 weeks ago, but seems like an eternity. I was in Idaho… the place I have lived the longest, out of all the places I have lived. My home??? I am not sure where my home is anymore. I sat in the dental chair days after returning from Africa and I think I made history, falling asleep during a root canal procedure. God answers our prayers in amazing ways. I spent Thanksgiving with my family and one of the only African families, I know of, in the state of Idaho. It was a blessing to have some of my African brothers and sisters around. There are so many white people in America! It is a shock! I flew across America to New Hampshire to my most recent home prior to living on the ship in Africa. But, is this my home? I don’t know… I am realizing more and more that this world is not my home… My true home is in Heaven. The word "cold" isn’t adequate to describe the chill that ran through my bones as I took my first step outside the Manchester Airport. I suppose it would have helped if I was wearing shoes instead of flip-flops. The piles of snow scattered about reminded me one of my first projects would be to dig through my storage items to find some snow pants and boots! Fully clothed in one of my African dresses, snow boots, gloves, and my winter coat, I drove the old familiar road toward Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center, my previous employer. Dartmouth is an absolutely incredible hospital, it employees over 6,000 people, and until this week, I was one of them. It was emotional walking through my old nursing unit and seeing everyone. It was great to be warmly welcomed back by my colleagues. It was fun sharing stories with them and laughing about the differences of nursing in Africa and in the United States. I relished in their attention and compliments for how the African lifestyle and clothing suit me. I agree with them and it is complex to comprehend leaving the States again to pay to volunteer in Africa. It is complex, but I am 100% sure it is what I want to do and what God has called me to do. It was like Christmas morning as I opened all my boxes stored in my friend’s basement. It was exciting digging in box after box and being reunited with my old teddy bears, winter clothes, and other small treasures. At the same time, I cried thinking of my selfishness and inner turmoil over wanting to keep my belongings for if and when I return to America, but not really needing any of the items in that spacious basement. During the last eight months, I lived in a shoebox, had one small, small closet, and I did not miss one of the items in the pile I was standing in. I was content. But… "what if I want this in the future…well, Laura, it isn’t practical to keep taking your friend’s space and storing items people could really use when you aren’t using them…but… I will need it if I come back…but, not within the next year… but I could use the money if I sold the items…but my time here is limited and who wants to come to a yard sale in a snow bank?" My head was about to explode. Being reunited with my West Lebanon Baptist Church family was superb. During the beginning of the service we prayed for someone to buy my car. Moments later, during the "meet and greet" time, two people reported interest in my car. PRAISE GOD! A few days later I sold my car! I cried tears of joy for God’s provision of providing a buyer, but tears of recognition, that my current life in America is slipping away. I enjoyed a busy day full of reunions and great conversation with treasured friends. Tired and blessed, I traveled to Sharon, Vermont, where I am staying with one of my "adopted families." Upon getting ready for bed, I was literally struck with lightening, intense, pain near my right kidney. I grabbed the phone to call my mom and dad in Idaho, like they could help from 3,000 miles away. In tears of agony, I rolled on the floor squeezing the life out of a borrowed teddy bear. I vomited related to the immense pain surging through my back. It was decided I should head to the emergency room, the kidney stones were probably back. I vomited off and on during the 25-minute drive to the hospital, my "adopted" mom doing her best to comfort me. The physical pain intensified and I was full of inner pain knowing the hospital bill was going to be HUGE and my health insurance status is mostly non-existent. I attempted to remind myself, "God owns all the money in the world and he can afford this bill." After a lethal dose of narcotics, the pain was almost gone. I had been in the emergency room for 5 hours and the doctors said I could go home. I called another friend from church to pick me up and arranged to stay at their house in town, considering my "adopted mom" had to work in the morning and she had left the ER around 2:30am. My friend, a true servant, picked me up, drove me to the pharmacy to get a slew of expensive drugs, and then helped tuck me in at 4:30 am for a fitful, painful night of sleep. Days later and many glasses of water later, some of the stones passed. I had numerous diagnostic tests and appointments with the doctors at Dartmouth. The current status: CT scan shows no more stones needing to pass at this time, but multiple stones in the early stages of formation. Nothing needs to be done at this time. The stones I gave the doctor are being analyzed to determine the root cause of this issue and the next plan of care. Am I going back to Africa? Yes! Brain tumors don’t get me down, so a little patch of kidney stones isn’t gonna stop me either! It just would be nice if the stones would leave me alone. Prayer request: The hospital bill for one of the tests was $6,000 USD alone. My God is big, but my faith is sometimes small, small. My heart is hurting trying to figure out where I am going to get the money needed for these bills. I am working with Dartmouth to get them to understand my current status. It is not like I am unemployed, or lazy, and wanting a free handout. I work for the King of Kings and my benefits are out of this world and it isn’t payday yet! I achieved a status of being kidney-pain free, but my tooth, on the other hand, "Oh, danger!" The Idaho root canal was supposed to take care of my dental pain. I should not be waking up at night with dental pain. The dentist even gave me antibiotics, there should not be infection-causing pain. What the heck? In God’s timing and plan I connected with a local dentist that is a believer in God and he miraculously got me an emergency appointment with an endontist (a special root canal dentist, it normally takes months to get in to see them). When I was leaving for my appointment, I found a large sum of cash in my purse. It had to have been put there by my Bible study group that I had shared my experiences with a few nights prior. But, why hadn’t I seen it before? I put it in a safe place and thanked God for this huge blessing and provision! After the endontist played with a flame and fire around my tooth, it was determined the wrong tooth had been worked on. The dentist on the ship did his best to diagnosis the pain in my tooth. The pain was confusing, referring to another tooth, the x-rays he interpreted were clear, the real culprit tooth, appeared fine and he didn’t have the technology available to put fire on the roots of my tooth to determine the source of infection. The ship dentist had drilled the suspected infected tooth and put an antibiotic in it, which meant the dentist is Idaho had to finish the work on that tooth, therefore not thinking to consider another tooth as the issue. After touching my tooth with fire and causing me to jump from the chair, the endontist said I needed another root canal. I started crying and the dentist asked if I was in pain. I reported "no, but I don’t know where I am going to get the money to pay for this. I pay to volunteer as a nurse in Africa." The dentist handed me a tissue and said, "I’ll be back to start the procedure in a few minutes." Man alive! I am kicking myself for not taking better care of my teeth when I was small. Miraculously, the money I found in my bag was the exact cost of the root canal, but that money was for my trip, not my health concerns. God is in control. As you can tell, I am full of emotion, thoughts, and stories. The following is the lyrics to a song called God is God by Steven Curtis Chapman. This song is a comfort to me and expresses some of what I cannot form into written word. I will keep you posted. Thanks for your prayers and endless encouragement.

God is God by Steven Curtis Chapman

And the pain falls like a curtain On the things I once called certain And I have to say the words I fear the most I just don’t know

And the questions without answers Come and paralyze the dancer So I stand here on the stage afraid to move Afraid to fall, oh, but fall I must On this truth that my life has been formed from the dust

God is God and I am not I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting So I’ll never understand it all For only God is God

And the sky begins to thunder And I’m filled with awe and wonder ‘Til the only burning question that remains Is who am I

Can I form a single mountain Take the stars in hand and count them Can I even take a breath without God giving it to me He is first and last before all that has been Beyond all that will pass

Oh, how great are the riches of His wisdom and knowledge How unsearchable for to Him and through Him and from Him are all things

So let us worship before the throne Of the One who is worthy of worship alone

God is God and I am not I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting God is God and I am not So I’ll never understand it all For only God is God

Africans dressed for a snowstorm

I arrived at the Liberian airport in tears. I pulled myself together to clear security and check-in. Good thing the flight was not full because the airline did not have my reservation. I boarded the plane with a heavy, exhausted heart. I attempted to settle in for the 7 hour flight to Brussels. Full of emotion and wanting to cry, I closed my eyes and started to pray. A few hours later I woke up and enjoyed a lovely airplane meal of rubber lasagna. It actually tasted amazing! With all the packing a good-byes during the day, I had forgotten to eat and I was ravenous. I laughed out loud when I saw a Liberian walking down the aisle wearing a stocking cap and the thickest winter jacket. I looked around the plane and realized all the Africans were dressed for a snowstorm. Bless their hearts! I arrived safely in Brussels and hit my first wave of culture shock. The airport was huge and decorated for Christmas. I missed spring and fall, so it is odd to think Christmas is coming! There were so many white people and none of them were smiling. My travel buddy Karoline and I sat in the corner with small tears forming in our eyes. We smiled when a Liberian women and her small boy approached us. They needed help making a phone call. I resisted the urge to grab the little boy and kiss him all over. Karoline helped the woman and said it was all worth it just to hear her say, “thank-you-oh.” A few hours later, I said good-bye to Karoline and we went our separate ways. It was perfect for Karoline to be the last person I said good-bye to. She was one of the first people I met on the ship. She was from Canada and when we met, we found out we were both nursing graduates from Trinity Western University. We even shared the same favorite professor. Karoline is ending here 3 years of service with Mercy Ships and our last week on the ship; she had the assignment of training me for my role of charge nurse next year. In essence, she is passing me here baton of service. Pray for her as her adjustment will be very difficult. I slept the majority of my 9.5 hour flight to Chicago. I did wake up for all my wonderful airplane meals. I do not know if the quality if airplane food has greatly improved or if my taste buds were really tired and out of shape, but I thought the food was divine! I had grapes! It was awesome. I have really been craving fresh produce and those 7 little grapes were delicious! I cleared US customs and was granted entry back into America! The airport was cold! I had gone from 99* F weather to 32*F in Chicago. My flip-flops were not cutting it. I guess it did not help matters that I made my first meal chocolate milk, a chocolate milkshake, and a crisp salad! The proper milk was incredible. I grew up on powered milk, which I am totally accustomed to, but I never could get used to the boxed room-temperature milk on the ship. I was pumped to have some real milk; I bet my calcium-depleted bones appreciated it too. The shivers that went up and down my spine were worth it as the smooth, milky beverages coated my throat! My lay-over was 6 hours in Chicago. After sobbing on the phone with my parents, I enjoyed a 30 minute massage from a little booth in the airport. I then called some of my best friends on the ship and was blessed to hear their voices. I feel asleep on the plane from Chicago to Salt Lake City, before the airplane took off. I was shivering and the Latin man next to me loaned me his sweatshirt. Even though I was totally out to the world, we spoke in Spanish and I thanked him for the use of his sweatshirt. I might have been dreaming it, but I think he told me my Spanish was fairly good. Oh, the inner conflict of my love for the Latin culture and language, but my growing passions and current call to Africa. God works in mysterious ways. Smelly, weary, and beyond the point of confused, and jet-lagged, I arrived in the arms of my wonderful God-fearing, parents. We quickly snagged my luggage and started the 2.5 hour drive to Idaho. After 39 hours of travel, I arrived at my child-hood home. I stood in the huge, spacious living room of my parent’s home and stared at the wall. I wanted to sleep, eat, use the toilet, shower, run around like crazy, cry, scream, and sleep all at the same time. After a few minutes of indecision, I settled for a shower. I took a 2 minute shower and even shut the water off and on in between the shampooing process. My parents were proud of me. I have learned many good things from living on a ship in Africa! Confused and uncertain of what time it was or which country I was in, I feel asleep thanking God for my African Adventures and that His story with me and adventures for me are not finished yet. More to come.

tears

It is the night before I leave Africa. I am sitting here at the computer full of emotion, exhausted, with tears running down my face. I have tears of sadness, grief, joy, and pure exhaustion. I am sad... to leave Liberia, the ship, and so many of the friends I have come to love here. I am sad... to know that many of my best friends will not be on the ship when I return. I grieve... for those we were not able to help and for the people of Liberia as they rebuild after their horrific years of war. Life is not easy here. My tears of joy come because God is so good. He has blessed me beyond anything I deserve. He has truly helped me to find a home wherever I am, because He is with me. My suitcase is empty, my flight arrival time is not confirmed, my room is a mess, I have good-byes to say, and I am tired. I will write more later. I leave the ship tomorrow at 5:00pm Africa time, which is 5 hours ahead of NH, 7 hours ahead of ID, and 8 hours ahead of BC. I covet your prayers as I travel home. Stay tuned to my blog from many postings of the "untold stories of Liberia." I love all of you.

what your name?

"What you name?" I cannot even count how many times I have been asked that question and how many times I have asked that question of the people I meet here. At home, I've met many people with a variety of names... from Tom, Sam, Rachel, Kim, David, Kelly, and so on and so forth. Occasionally, I meet someone with an slightly more unique name such as Shalom, Lanae, Ali, Jonas, or Logan, but even those names are not that unusual. In Africa it is a different story altogether. Most little girls dream of meeting a handsome prince, falling in love, and riding off into the sunset to a land of "happily ever after." I have dreamed of finding my prince, but never did I imagine, that I would actually meet someone named Prince. One of the first weeks I was here, I took care of a patient named Prince, he was charming, and did ask me to marry him, but I graciously declined. I was shocked that my patient was actually named Prince, but now that I have been in Africa for 7.5 months I now know that Prince is actually one of the more "normal" names. I have met Darling Boy his name was a great fit, he actually was very darling. Another baby was named Praise. We called him Mega Praise because he is one big baby. I have also met Gift, Baby Girl, Blessing, Peewee, Playboy, God's Gift, Baby, Princess, Precious, Dearest, Hope and Joy( a set of twins), Anointed, Lucky Boy, and Daughter. Some more of the common names in Africa include Hawa, Finda, Kaymah, Varlee, Bendu, Jitta, and Esi. I have asked a number of the parents where they come up with the names for their children and most of them say from life circumstances. This past week I took care of a delightful, little 3 month-old baby that had a cleft lip surgery, his name.... Oldpa.... There was nothing old or pa about him, I have no idea where that name came from, but I won't ever forget him or his name. Directly across from Oldpa was my 5 year old patient named... Mama.... I love this place! This culture is so unique and beautiful.

Stinky, Dirty, White Girls

After working 62 hours in 6 days, I was ready for a little down time. Although I wanted nothing more than to sleep for days, I mustered up the energy for a small adventure. The plan was to go to the market. In any developed country, a trip to the market is not normally considered an adventure, but in Africa, everything is an adventure! My friend Tina and I filled our water bottles, donned our sun cream (Irish term for sunscreen), carefully stowed our spending money in our bags, and set out for the day. The idea was to take a taxi to Water Side, a market known to have beautiful African fabric and fun wheelbarrows to shop from. We left the ship early in the morning; hoping to avoid the heat and competition for a taxi. We reached the main road and hoped for a taxi, considering we had only been outside for 10 minutes and the sweat was already forming droplets above our lips. It is hot here and there was no chance we wanted to walk the 45 minutes-1 hour that it would take to reach the market. Taxi after taxi rushed past us as we held our pathetic, little, white, fingers in the air, pointing to the direction we wished to go. Finally, it was decided we should walk father down the road to where more taxis gather. No luck; overfilled taxis continue to whizz past us. Jokingly, I suggest we ask a little man with a wheelbarrow if he would push us to the market. People here are more than willing to do anything for money. Besides my buddy and I weigh less than the weight of the bricks, concrete, steel, or lumbar that the men here normally push. We keep walking with the hopes that eventually we will find a taxi. At this point, the sun is scorching and there is absolutely no shade in site. The road I am walking on does not have sidewalks. I weave my way around huge potholes, piles of garbage, poop, and wheelbarrows. To my left, there is a two lane road, with about 5 lanes of traffic in it. Everyone makes their own path. I hope I don’t get sideswiped on my quest for an adventure. I stop and drink almost a gallon of water in one gulp. Momentarily refreshed, we carry on. Everyone in town is starring at the two white girls walking down the street. It makes me feel awkward. I hate feeling awkward, so I smile, wave, and say, “How you be? Or “How d’ body be?,” typical Liberian greetings. The hard stares disappear and I’ve made new friends. One hour later, I am thoroughly drenched with sweat, but I have reached the market. Holy cow it is hot! Can it really be November? Exhausted and almost out of water; let the shopping begin! We wander around street after street, stopping to look at fabric, and all the other interesting items for sale. One man yells, “white woman, come here, for you, I make good offer, guaranteed quality here.” As he tries to sell me previously worn shoes that were shipped from American and were supposed to be handed out for free to the needy people here. Another man shouts at my friend, “I want to marry you! Carry me to America!” My friend and I cannot help but giggle and she says, “Sorry-oh, I’m Canadian!” He is quick to reply, “Okay, carry me to Canada!” We laugh and keep walking. Hour after hour passes as we wander the market streets. We are thoroughly parched and look for something safe to drink. We spy a little umbrella on the street corner with a cooler in its shade. We hope it has cold, sealed, drinks inside. Although, anything wet at this point would be divine! To my great surprise, there is not only soda, but juice for sale! Juice is hard to come by here. I purchased two 100% pure Minute Maid orange juices. Oh, how exquisite it tasted! I haven’t had proper orange juice since April and my thirst is now quenched! More shopping! Behind me on the street there is loud music blaring. The sound quality from speakers on a moving wheelbarrow is impressive! When I can finally decipher the words from all the other market noise, I recognize the song as one of my favourite African tunes! I decide to barter with the mobile DJ for a CD. I must have a copy of my favorite music to play for all my friends at home! While the wheelbarrow driver is playing me different selections from the album, my buddy and I attempt to dance along with the music. A small crowd forms and the locals laugh and laugh at the attempt of white girls trying to dance. I’ve got no rhythm! A deal was sealed and I walk away content with my new purchase, just hoping the CD actually works. A few more hours have passed and we are feeling hungry. We stop a woman with bananas on her head and purchase two for about 20 cents. My buddy quickly peels her banana and is ready to take a bit when I accidently bump her arm, causing her to drop it onto the street! She was so sad! No five second rule here. A police man watched the entire exchange and quickly stopped the banana lady and said, “Two more bananas for the ladies, on me.” I cannot say I have ever had a man buy me bananas before. I was touched! We thanked him and he thanked us for our work with the Mercy Ship. Very few white people hang out in Liberia, therefore, he had a pretty good guess that we were with the ship. Satisfied with our little snack, we keep wandering around the market. We were looking at some beautiful fabric pieces for an African outfit, when an elegant African lady stopped at the fabric booth down the row from where I was standing. She was wearing a very unique, stunning dress. I have been here for almost 8 months and I have never seen such a dress. She caught me starring at her, so I quickly explained that I was admiring her dress. She proudly told me she made it and went on the say she was a seamstress and had a shop just around the corner. She promptly offered to sew a dress for me and invited me to see where her shop was so I could come for measurements; after purchasing fabric. I asked how far her shop was, she assured me, “not far, just around the corner.” That was my first mistake. In Africa, you should never ask how far something is in distance, but rather in how long it takes to get there. “Just around the corner,” turned out to be a good 45 minutes walk. Yikes! I should have worn better shoes! She had a very nice little shop and I told her she may see me in the future. We have been out in the sun for about 6 hours now. I cannot believe how much time I can spend in the market, especially when there is not much to buy and I don’t have any money. We decided to look in a few more fabric stores and then head back to the ship. We stepped into a store that had a fan running on a generator; we pretended to be looking at the items for sale, while catching a few cool blasts of air from the fan. I was more subtle about my intentions in the store than my friend and the store owner abruptly told her she would have to pay for the use of his fan. We went on our way. We ducked into a Lebanese owned fabric warehouse. The temperature inside this room was intense. My friend told the store owner he needed a fan. He said he would love one, but then all the street folk would gather around his fan and not buy anything. Smart man! The man made small talk while we looked at his fabric and he asked if we wanted something to drink. I was slightly confused by his offer considering he sells fabric and there certainly wasn’t a vending machine in the corner of his store. We attempted to decline his offer, but the dried grooves of pre-dehydration on my tongue spoke up. Next thing I knew, a little black man from behind the fabric piles ran out into the market and returned with two ice cold Sprites. Wow, what an incredible day! I haven’t had a man buy me dinner, or anything like that for about 10 years, and in one day a free banana and a Sprite! I was blessed by the kindness of the shop owner and police man. It was like God was smiling down on me, he didn’t answer my prayer for a cool breeze or clouds in the sky, but he knew my hearts cry was to feel refreshed and he provided for me in different ways. Time to go home, but there was a small, small problem; the need for a taxi. I was certain my legs would not carry me back to the ship. Tina and I stood on the street side and began the waiting process for a taxi. We laughed out of pure exhaustion at our pathetic state. We looked horrible and didn’t smell much better! We weren’t getting anywhere and it was getting late and we didn’t want to miss dinner on the ship! Thankfully, a police man, different from the banana police man, came to help us get a cab. He wasn’t having much success at first, but then he flagged down a private vehicle and the driver agreed to drive us to the ship. We made the 7 minute drive to the ship and I asked the man how much we owed him. He declined my money offer and thanked us for our hard work for the Liberian people. I felt I owed him something for his generosity, so I offered him my shiny, red apple. He quickly accepted my payment and drove off. We were stinky, sweaty, thirsty, hungry, and dirty, but home. What a day!

Vote

Over the past few months, I have been humbled and encouraged to have a number of my African friends tell me they are praying for America. I know America is a mission field and needs prayer, just as any other country but, at times I revert back to the mentality that America and other developed countries are without need. It is easy to view European countries and North America as the countries that are to be praying for and sending missionaries to underdeveloped nations, not the other way around. I know this mentality is completely faulty, but nonetheless, it exists. Being on the ship has been an incredible blessing and it has been awesome to see the cultural diversity in God's kingdom. It has strengthened my faith to see so many people from different walks of life, believing the same Gospel and message of salvation. In essence, the ship is a tiny taste of heaven. There are people here from many tribes, tongues, and nations; all working together for God's glory. The message we believe in is the same. There are people on the ship from Ireland, Wales, England, Norway, Sweden, Holland, Germany, Russia, Ukraine, Korea, Japan, Nepal, Canada, USA, Central America, Jamaica, Brazil, Dominican Republic, Nigeria, Togo, Benin, Kenya, South Africa, Sierra Leone, Ghana, New Zealand, and Australia. Those are just a few of the countries represented here on the ship. Over the past few weeks there have been plenty conversations regarding the upcoming election in the United States. My African friends have told me they are very concerned about our election because they know what takes place in America, influences the rest of the world. I am glad that my friends are lifting America up in prayer. America is at a critical point in its history. Other countries recognize it, but do we? We need to unite and come before God as a nation. As election day is here, do not fear. America is in God's hands, people are lifting our country up in prayer. Take your stand today, continue to pray for our country, and vote today! Forgive me, I know this post is fragmented and poorly written. I am in the middle of another night shift. My thoughts are all over the place, but I cannot stress the importance of your votes today!

So, what next?

It is November 1, 2008 and I have been in Africa for almost 7 months now! I cannot describe how wonderful it has been to be here living my childhood dream, of serving the Lord in medical missions. I have enjoyed every minute of my time here (well, not the minutes when my kidney stones were moving around). But, nonetheless, I am passionate about the work here and the work that Mercy Ships is doing for the Kingdom. I have embraced the African culture with all my heart and energy and it has been an incredible and extremely rewarding experience! The Liberian people are amazing. Their unwavering faith, courage, compassion, and gratitude encourage me in so many ways. In my mind, this trip was a trial of sorts, to continue exploring the call of missions; I feel God has placed on my heart. Prior to this trip, I had completed a number of brief mission trips, but hungered for more exposure to missions. The past 7 months here have been a great exposure to missions and at this time in my life, I cannot imagine going back to my totally comfortable life and job in America. I feel a huge part of me would be aching to be back in Africa with Mercy Ships. Therefore, after much consideration and listening to God’s leading, I have decided to continue serving with Mercy Ships! This decision was not made irrationally and I believe many of you will not be surprised at my choice to come back to Africa. So, what next? I am returning to Idaho, as originally planned for the holidays. I will be leaving Africa November 21, 2008. I will stay in Idaho through American Thanksgiving. I will then travel to New Hampshire December 3- December 16. I am hoping to connect with all my WLBC and DHMC family and friends in New Hampshire. I will also be looking to move some of my belongings into more permanent storage. I may also try to sell my car. In mid December, I will return to Idaho and spend Christmas with my family, brother, sister-in-law, my brother’s in-laws, and my Paul Baptist Church Family. In mid January, I will be going to the headquarters for Mercy Ships in Garden Valley, Texas. I will be enrolling in a course called Gateway. The course is designed to train and equip people for long-term service in missions. There is a field project with this course in the Dominican Republic. I am excited about this outreach because I will have a chance to continue working on my Spanish and my love for tortillas, rice, and beans, along with little caramel colored children remains. After the outreach to the Dominican is complete, I will be returning to the ship. In early March, I will fly to Benin and board the Mercy Ship once again. Benin, another extremely poor, West African country, is the 2009 Mercy Ship Outreach location. Benin is east of Liberia and shares its Western border with Togo and Eastern border with Nigeria. A few small facts about Benin; it is the birth place of Voodoo and the official language is French! I have also been asked to be a charge nurse upon my return. This role will be challenging for sure! My African adventures are just beginning and I am so thankful that all of you are in it with me. I love you and cherish you. I covet your prayers and support in every manner as I continue to serve our Lord. “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for ME will save it!” Luke 9:24 In His Hands and Will, Laura Ziulkowski

African Wildlife

What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of Africa; elephants, hippos, cheetahs, giraffes, and amazing wildlife? Did you grow up thinking there are animals running all over Africa? Or that missionary kids ride elephants to school instead of a school bus and that everyone has a pet monkey? We all know geography and natural history were never my strong points in school. Therefore, I grew up thinking Africa was one huge country where animals rule the land and people live in huts trying not to get eaten by the animals. I was totally shocked to arrive in Liberia and learn that there are no wild animals here! I was hoping to jump off the airplane and see some of God’s amazing creatures roaming the land. As many of you know, I do not give up easily and if I have an idea in my mind, I do everything I can to make it reality. Over the past few months, I have heard whispers about the location of some monkeys in the area, therefore I have made it my side mission to find these little creatures and count observing them as my viewing of the African wildlife. I am proud to announce, that I found monkeys! I recently visited a place called the Wulki Farm. It is a privately owned farm, zoo of sorts. The owner has ostriches, crocodiles, and two monkeys. Everyone that visits is guaranteed to see the ostriches and crocodiles because they are caged, but it is only a few persistent visitors that find the monkeys because they roam a large plot of land and jungle freely. Our group checked out the ostrich family and crocodiles, but then we jumped in our land rover and drove back and forth on the road in pursuit of the monkeys. Now, of course, I have been to a zoo and I have seen monkeys, but never in the wild. We drove around forever and were about to give up when, in the distant trees, we saw movement and… MONKEYS! I was so excited. We got out of the vehicle and attempted to befriend the little creatures. Friendship was made and we proceeded to play for about 1.5 hours with the monkeys. We laughed and laughed as we watched them run around chasing each other and some of the guys in our group. One of the monkeys walked directly up to our group and put his hands up, like a small child wanting to be held. It was precious. Everyone took turns holding the “nice” monkey. One of them was mean and just chased people and stuck his tongue out at us, but the other one loved to be held. It was funny to watch the “nice” monkey with my friends. If the monkey approached a female, he would act like a baby wanting to be held. But if he approached a male, he would try to chew on their ankles and use their body like a jungle gym, jumping around, and climbing on them. I was afraid to hold the monkey and as many of you know, I do not even pet or hold, dogs, cats, hamsters. The only pets I play with are fish! Despite, my fear/dislike of hairy animals, I decided this opportunity may only come once and I picked up the little hairy monkey and I have pictures to prove it. Enjoy! God bless!

ORANGE-oranges

My far distance from home and the modern luxuries of a first world nation have caused me to become extremely thankful for the small, ordinary things of daily life. Let me tell you about some of the things that I have been thankful for lately. A few weeks ago, I was going through the food line in the dining hall. I was approaching the fruit section of the line when suddenly, I spotted a glorious piece of fruit in front of me. I could not believe my eyes... ORANGE, oranges! I was so excited! It was like Christmas morning! I was so pumped to have a proper colored orange. We are extremely blessed on the ship and we eat very well, but our produce section is often limited. We have oranges on a regular basis, but they are green. Can it actually be called an orange if it is green? The oranges we get are ripe and totally ready for eating, but green. I just cannot wrap my head around the idea of eating green oranges. ORANGE, oranges, are just better! The small things in life remind me how much Jesus loves me and this past week He decided to bless me with another tasty treat; carrot sticks! Oh, my goodness, I jumped up and down when I saw carrot sticks in our food line. I ran around the dining hall, with the excitement of someone who has won the lottery, telling all my friends about the carrot sticks. It is a rare treat for us to get fresh produce, partly because of the work that the food preparation takes. Our galley staff has to bleach, wash, bleach, and again wash all our vegetables before they can even begin slicing them. So, you can imagine how hard it is for the galley staff to prepare carrot sticks for 400 people. I was so excited about the carrot sticks that I skipped all the other dinner components and filled my entire plate with carrot sticks, covered them with ranch dressing, and that's all I ate for dinner. In case you are wondering, yes, Africa is changing me...Not only was I excited about a vegetable, but I also ate an entire plate full of the vegetables! Many people have asked what I want to do first or eat first when I return home. I have been craving Mexican food and steak! I have already informed my mom and dad that I want to head to my favorite Mexican restaurant as soon as I return to Idaho and then eat steak after that. To my incredible surprise, my craving for steak was met on board just the other day. We had the most amazing steak for dinner a few days ago! The dinner was complete with baked potatoes and A1 Steak sauce! Holy Cow it was so good! (soon to be uploaded a photo of me and my amazing dinner) Every good thing comes from God. I am thankful that He knows what is best for me and He blesses me with small things and bigs things too!

Sweet Mama

My mom made it home to Idaho. She really enjoyed her time here and I wouldn't doubt it if she plans a return trip in the future! Everyone on the ship thought she was lovely and beautiful! My African friends called her "Sweet Mama." I know she blessed all the people she cared for. Thanks for praying for her!

Kidney Stones Update

Friends and Family, I am hanging in there and I feel much better. No more pain or fevers. I am getting stronger every day. Thanks for your prayers! I will go see the doctor again on Tuesday. It is possible that we will do another CT Scan to see if some of my kidney stones are dissolving. I am praying they are all gone! I started back to work yesterday for a 12 hour shift. I was totally tired after that shift and I slept great! Considering patient census is down and I was beat, from yesterday, the charge nurse gave me a break today and I only had to do 8 hours of my 12 hour shift. I think I will go to bed soon! Take care!

Life

For all of you have been fearing that something is wrong with me because of my lack of posts, let me ease your mind. No need to fear the unknown anymore, something is wrong with me! I will start with last weekend, I worked the 7am-7pm day shifts on both Saturday and Sunday. Then I followed those shifts with night duty Monday, Tuesday, and was graciously given Wednesday off, considering I was not feeling excellent. I saw the doctor on Wednesday morning and was started on antibiotics for a suspected bladder infection, yikes, never had one of those before. My condition was not getting better so, on Friday, I saw the doctor again. The doctor changed my antibiotics. Saturday morning, I had a wicked huge amount of pain in my back and nausea. I could not get comfortable, it hurt so bad. I was rolling in pain crying and crying (although I do have a flair for the dramatic, it seriously hurt worse than any pain I have ever had). The on-call doctor came to my cabin and decided I should go to the hospital. Lucky for me, the hospital is down the hall. An IV was started and I was given lots of pain medicine. I vomited a few times as well. I had two ultrasounds, more pain medicine, and lots of IV fluid. It was decided I should have a CT Scan. The CT Scan revealed tons of kidney stones in both of my kidneys. How they got there, we have no idea. I have had interesting health challenges throughout my life, but no plumbing challenges like these. Yikes. I attempted to rest in the hospital over night. Praise God, the pain medicine I was given, worked. It took away all my pain. I was given tons over IV fluid to flush out the kidney stones. In the wee hours of Sunday morning, one kidney stone came out. Sunday afternoon, I went back to my cabin, where I have been resting and drinking water like a fish. Today I went to the doctor for a follow-up appointment. I had a fever this morning, which should not be possible with all the antibiotics I have been taking, so we are checking for malaria (in Africa, one always has to check for malaria, even if you see no mosquito bites). We are going to continue with antibiotic treatment, rest, and lots of fluids. The crew doctor is also going to have a UN Radiologist review my CT Scan for an additional opinion on all the stones that were found. It is unknown when those stones will break loose and if they are small enough to come out naturally. Therefore, my trip to Sierra Leone, has been cancelled. I am really bummed about the cancellation of my trip. But the trip would not be fun, if the stones were to get excited again, and try to come out. I was going to check out more of this African nation that I am so fascinated with, but I guess there will be time for more adventure later. I am okay and resting! My friends here (& mom) are amazing and it is such a blessing when your doctor prays with you as you are in pain. There is no other place I rather be right now. I am hoping all of you are well! Love you lots!

Loving My Babies

We loaded into the land rover once again, but something was different this time. I was in the driver's seat! Yup, you heard me! Just recently, I became a certified Mercy Ships Driver. This is a unique, special, and frightening privilege. For those of you who have visited 3rd world countries; you know that the roads are crazy and dangerous! Speed limits are nonexistent, drivers pass on the left and right sides of the roads, basically the road is chaos. Here in Liberia, there are no stop signs, or yield signs, and the traffic lights that exist, are not functioning. The potholes in the road are deep and filled with manky, rank, muddy water. If you hit a pothole, there is a good chance you will get sucked in it and end up in China, or need a crane to pull you out. Exciting stuff! Up until this point, I have been only a passenger on these adventurous roads. Honestly, sometimes I even close my eyes, just so I will not scream and scare the driver when I see the cars coming toward us. I never planned on driving here, but often our plans change... Let me tell you how this came to be. Remember my precious babies at the Sister's of Charity that I told you about a few months ago? In case you were wondering, I have not neglected them. I actually go to the Sister's of Charity every Wednesday morning, when I am not working. I am one of the regular members of this outreach team. My regular visits to Sisters and relatively long term status on the ship has ushered me into the role of being in charge of the children's outreach at Sisters. I love to hold the children, kiss them, sing to them, and play with them. Well, I was so touched and moved by my first visit to Sisters, that I spread the word and now many people want to come too. The desire of more crew members to be involved in this ministry required that a second driver be found to take an additional vehicle to the site. I was selected because I was one of the only people who go regularly to Sisters who knows how to drive stick-shift (thanks to my old lawn mowing business), on the right side of the road ( I beat the Brits on this one), and who was not afraid of the task! I am always up for an adventure! Therefore, I am now driving on the streets of Liberia! For all of you prone to worrying.... DON'T! I am alive to write you this story. I only stalled the car once in traffic, I made it up the big hill I was afraid of rolling back down, and I didn't end up in China! I am still in Africa... loving my babies.

Night Shifts

It was my fourth night shift in a row and I was tired to say the least. In my weary state I asked God for the strength to get through another night. I had 9 patients in the VVF Ward (the ward for women who have had traumatic pregnancies and now are leaking urine and sometimes stool) and 1 patient in the ICU, actually a friend and crew member who had broken his leg in a soccer match and was waiting for surgery. I was also responsible for 2 patients in a ward down the hall who were from Sierra Leone and would be leaving in the early hours of the morning. At the beginning of the shift I was honored, I guess, with being given the role of charge nurse. I was not given then charge nurse role because my nursing skills are amazing, but because out of all the nurses working that night, I had been with Mercy Ships longest. I felt the stress level rising inside of me. I prayed God would help me to have a positive attitude and strength for the busy night ahead. With shift report over, I headed to see my VVF patients first. That is where the marathon of a night started. It was one thing after another. There were two of us responsible for 18 VVF patients. One of our patients started bleeding, she was three days post-surgery and she should not have been bleeding as much as she was. The doctor had encouraged us to continue monitoring the bleeding and start and IV and check the patient's hemoglobin if we were concerned. We were really getting concerned. The patient's blood pressure was dropping and more blood was coming. As charge nurse, I was responsible for paging the doctor. Of course the pager system would not work. When we finally reached the doctor, he came and assessed the patient. We were told to continue monitoring the bleeding. We were very concerned, but kept checking the patient. In the mean time, my blessed patients, could not understand that I was very busy with an emergency and they kept yelling my name across the ward. One patient wanted lip gloss, another wanted a surgical cap to cover her braids, while another needed some cream (lotion for her skin). I love getting small things like this for my patients, but I was starting to become really frustrated because I could not get everything done when my patients wanted it done. Then I get mad at myself for feeling frustrated because I want to be able to do everything for my patients when they want it, but that is just not possible. My emotions were starting to churn and my exhausted state was hitting an all time max. I was trying to keep my focus, but having difficulty. At this point in the evening, I needed to page the lab technician to come to the lab. Again, the paging system was broken. Uggg, after extra effort, the lab tech was contacted and came to the ward. More patients yelling, "Lada, come!" They try to say "Laura," but it sounds more like "Lada or Laywer." In my hospital at home, most patients have private rooms and the nurse is not in their view all the time, but not here, all our patients are in one large room. This has benefits and drawbacks. This night, I was seriously feeling the drawbacks. In the middle of all this, I was performing the simple task of hand washing. When I turned off the sink to dry my hands, the sink made the most horrific sound. It sounded like a heard of cattle in labor. The screeching was terrible! Immediately my task focus changed, I needed to page the plumber. Yup, you guessed it, the paging system did not work...Oh well! The plumber finally came to the ward and fixed the screaming sink. Meanwhile, on the dock, a patient was found unconscious. She was rushed to the ICU where she was stabilized and sent to my ward. Yikes! It was about 10:30pm at this point on the VVF ward, the doctors decided to do an emergency surgery on our bleeding patient. Not good news for my patient, but a relief for me, knowing the doctors were attending to her needs. We called the OR nurse, anesthesia provider, and the OR staff to come to the operating room. With this patient in the safe hands of our doctors; I moved onto my next task. Time to check all my patients, take their vital signs, fill their water bottles, and empty their catheter bags. One thing after another was happening and taking my attention away from the task at hand. At that moment, when I was ready to pull out my hair, Jane, my Irish roommate, also a nurse, popped in to see how I was doing. She immediately saw the stress and chaos on the ward, went down the hall, put on her scrubs, and returned to help in any way she could. Even though it was her night off, she came to help. Jane has the heart of a true servant. Jane's help gave me the chance to break away and check on my friend and patient, Theo, in the ICU. Now, do not worry, if he was truly in critical condition, I would have checked on him sooner. I knew he was stable. While I was checking on him and attempting to get some supplies out of a cupboard, I stood up really quickly and slammed the dickens out of my head. I saw stars for a second and then the tears just started flowing. At that moment, all my stress started pouring out my eyes in the form of huge crocodile tears. I knew I needed a break. I walked down the hall to my cabin, then let the tears run freely. My roommates, all home, which is very unusual, immediately came to me and started praying. What a blessing, to have my home just down the hall and people willing to carry my burdens to Jesus with me. With renewed strength and an aching head; I went back to the ward. Back on the ward, it was still crazy. My mom, working on the ward next to me was recruited to assist with the patient from the ICU, she graciously helped out, while I was still stressed and trying to catch up on the care for my patients. At 2:00am things were finally starting to calm down. I was standing in the middle of all my patient's charts working on catching up on late medications when Clementine, a ward disciple came through the door. She had heard about the chaos on the ward and was moved to come and pray for the patients and nurses. Amazing, the way God cares for us. In the middle of the storm, God sent someone to pray over me. Clementine richly blessed me as she prayed for God's peace to come upon the ward. Wow, I work in an amazing place! The night hours quickly disappeared, not a chance for me to feel sleepy. At 6:00am I started waking the patients that would be leaving for Sierra Leone. They showered, dressed, and ate. I helped them carry their bags out and watched them drive away. At 7:00pm the night before, the last thing I wanted to do was have the responsibility of discharging patients at such an early hour. But, it was the perfect way to end my shift and start a new day... As I reflect back on this crazy night shift, more of the "busy" details fade from my mind. But the smiles on the faces of the patients walking down the gangway that morning will never fade from my memory. That is what it is all about and for them... I would do it all again.

Prayer Request

Dear Friends and Family, I am doing well. I have almost hit my 5 month mark! I am entirely content and blessed to be here in Africa. I do have a prayer request. Pray for my spiritual health and walk with God. There are so many distractions here on the ship. Helping people, fellowship time, adventures into town and across the countryside, ministry opportunities, and the list goes on. I am struggling to find a quiet place and time to meet with God. Do not get me wrong, God is in everything here on the ship, but nothing can take the place of daily time with God. In some sort of naivety, I thought I would immediately have a closer relationship with God away from the distractions of the modern world, but that is not the case. As with any relationship in life, one must take time and invest energy to make a relationship grow, pray I invest plenty of my daily time talking to God. It is my deepest desire to grow closer to God and I need prayers for discipline in this area of my life. Pray that my fulfilment comes from my relationship with God rather than from my ministry for Him. I love all of you!

Prayers for Safe Travel

My Mom left Idaho Monday and should be arriving on the ship in a few hours. Pray for her continued safety as she is traveling here. Thanks!

16- Years Old & Pregnant

Kay was 16 years old and pregnant. It was late at night and she had just drifted off to sleep. Silence had settled over her little village in rural Liberia. Suddenly, the sound of gunfire and screaming erupted, breaking the silence. Kay awoke, startled by the commotion outside her hut. She looked around to see her family members running in all directions. At once, she knew the rebels had chosen this night to attack her village. Kay had no choice, but to run, or become another victim of the rebels. Outside her hut, she found a friend. The two of them, hand-in-hand, ran as fast as they could away from the rebels. The trouble is, Kay's labor process started and she was becoming fatigued quickly. Each time Kay and her friend slowed to a stop and slipped into the shadow of darkness, they could hear their pursuer. They kept running, but continued to be followed. The labor pains were increasing and the baby started to crown. If the two stopped running, all three of them would be killed. But, the expecting mama could not run any longer. Finally, out of pure desperation, the friend grabbed the baby's head, which was now partially out, and pulled with all her strength. Piercing pain circulated throughout Kay's womb. Kay fought back the urge to scream and wail. Kay and her friend briefly looked at the new baby. The baby was dead, its neck had been broken while being pulled from Kay's womb. With heavy hearts, the two left the baby under a tree and kept running. At some point the two found a wheelbarrow and a very weak Kay, with incredible tissue damage to her womb, was pushed in a wheelbarrow to Ghana. Kay's traumatic labor process left her with a hole between her vaginal area and bladder. This hole caused her to constantly drip urine. Kay was ridiculed, told she smelled like "dead fish," and her life became very lonely and hopeless. Kay ended up in a refugee camp. Although life to this point had be traumatic for Kay, God had his hand upon her. Kay knew this and kept praying God would help her. She was selected for surgery on board the Mercy Ship a few years ago in Ghana. The surgery was helpful, but not as successful as hoped for. The damage to Kay's womb and bladder were extensive. Kay needed more surgical intervention, but the Mercy Ship had sailed on from Ghana. While Kay was on the ship in Ghana, a crew member named Shay participated in the "adopt-a-patient" program and befriended her. Shay would visit Kay on the ward, encouraging her, praying with her, listening to her, and loving her. When Kay was discharged from the ship, Shay continued to visit her in the refugee camp. Their friendship has continued throughout the years and the two have become " adopted mom and daughter." It is because of this relationship that Kay was able to come to the Mercy Ship again. Shay, Kay's adopted mama provided the funds for her to travel here. Kay reached Monrovia a few days before her scheduled operation and she was reunited with Shay. One day while Kay was out in town, she was confronted by a man that insisted he knew her. Kay told the man that was not possible, she had been gone from Liberia for seven years. The man persisted and said he knew her family. Kay could not believe that such a concept would be true because she thought all her family died in the war. But, a glimmer of hope sparked in Kay's heart and she followed the man to see if his claim was true. Indeed, it was! Kay was reunited with some of her brothers just a few weeks ago. She had thought they were all dead! She is being healed in more ways than she ever dreamed of. Kay just underwent another surgery on board the Mercy Ship. I had the honor of watching her surgery. Things are going well, no leaking urine. Kay is still on bed rest because of the extensive amount of work that was performed on her, but she never complains. In fact, any time I turn around in the ward, all I see is her sparkling eyes and glimmering smile. She bears the mark of one that has truly found hope and healing.

Rumors

A few weeks ago a local newspaper released an article making extreme and ridiculously false accusations directed toward Mercy Ships. The security situation around Monrovia is better than it has been in years, but nonetheless a baseline level of crime exists. There have been a number of tragic murders lately. All the victims have been found with their kidneys missing. The article that was released reported," that a faith-based, charity, hospital ship, docked in Liberia, was responsible for these murders and organ thefts" (an obvious reference to Mercy Ships). Furthermore, we have been accused of plotting and training others to kill people and steal the kidneys that we "then sell in America for $600,000". Of course these rumors are false and we hoped with time the rumor would die; it has not. Therefore, this past week the captain of the ship has put us on a heightened state of security. Threats have been made toward some of our crew when out in town and a local man approached a member of our eye field team asking "how much money he could get for the kidneys belonging to his mentally challenged nephew". This man was arrested. The captain and security team on the ship have been working closely with the governmental authorities regarding this tense situation. The government has been helpful and totally supportive of Mercy Ships. President Ellen Johnson Sirleaf has apologized profusely for the situation and she communicates with our safety officers on a regular basis. On Saturday, the Interim CEO/Acting Managing Director of Mercy Ships held a press conference at the governmental buildings in Monrovia making a public statement addressing the false rumors. My concern and prayer requests are not for my safety (yes, it is important, but I feel totally safe in the palm of God's hand), but for the people of Liberia. Pray for those spreading the rumors. Those trying to steal the joy, hope, and healing we offer in Jesus' name. Many of our patients face immense challenges to get to the ship. They do not need anything more standing in the path of God's gift for them: Eternal life, grace, forgiveness, and physical restoration through life changing surgeries on the Mercy Ship. Pray for the spiritual battle happening here. Pray that the road to grace and healing for our patients would be smooth. On the ship we "know the truth and that it will set us free (John 8:32)" Pray that Liberia will see and find this truth.

My Medical Review

I have been here for 4 months already! I cannot believe how fast time goes! Many of you know I had a number of health challenges last year. Because of these health concerns, Mercy Ships is requiring that I have a mandatory medical review at my 4 month point of service. I told them I was totally fine, but having "brain surgery" on your medical record, does not reassure many people. The medical review will advise them if I am healthy enough to stay until November. I am pleased to tell you... I am not coming home yet! I had my medical review on Wednesday and the doctor says I am doing fine! Praise God; the white girl will have more African Adventures! Thanks for your thoughts and prayers!

Return to Tenegar

Early this morning, I hopped into a Mercy Ship land rover and made my way to the Medical Clinic Construction site in Tenegar. I jumped out of the land rover ready to work and get dirty! I was greeted by a pile of fire ants and began to dance trying to get the ants out of my pants! Holy cow, those little ants move fast and their bites sting. After I recovered from my ant dance we had group prayer committing the day to God. I was assigned the job of white washing the clinic walls. After about five attempts at making the white wash the correct consistency, I was ready to paint! I painted all day long. The African men and local villagers kept coming up to me saying, "thank you, thank you!" It was really funny when one of the men said, "I didn't think you could work." Oh, he should have seen me back in the days of "A to Z Lawn Service!" After hours of painting, I was putting out a proper sweat wondering if these men ever break for lunch. Just at that moment, a beautiful African lady came into the clinic carrying a huge container of food on her head. I was really craving my peanut butter sandwich, but chose to embrace the eating experience and try some proper African cusine. I grabbed my bowl of rice and joined the other men in a circle on the clinic floor. Then I stared at my bowl of rice and saw a fish staring back at me! Yikes! I was thinking, "Lord, help me eat this so I don't offend these people." I spooned pieces of rice out around the fish and slowly chewed. I was relieved to hear one of the men say, "if you don't want all of it, I will eat it!" Oh, man I was so thankful for that answer to prayer. I ate a little more rice and handed over my bowl and fishy friend to a thankful, hungry, African man! After we were done eating we spent a small time singing and having devotional time with the construction workers. The majority of the men that work on site are Muslims, but God is using the Mercy Ship team to reach them, even in their remote village, through a daily task such as construction work. Throughout the day, I met a few more of God's creatures. A milliapeed freaked me out, some huge black bugs walked past me, and a toad jumped and scared me to death! One of the coolest things I came across was something the locals called "shy grass" or "sleeping grass." It is so neat. It is a type of plant, ground cover, or grass that looks lush and green until you touch it. When you touch it, it immediatly becomes shrivveled and dead looking. It is crazy! I ran around the clinic, kicking and touching the grass to see it shrivle and then "come back to life". God's creations are amazing. It was a great day and now I am ready to hit the hay!

Listen to a Small Part of My World

Dear Friends and Family, I have done my best to try and update you on all that happening here in Africa and I am still working on finding the words to describe some of my most recent adventures. It is so hard to put into words all that I am experiencing, learning, and feeling. But, praise God, a unique opportunity is available for you to hear some of my thoughts and my voice out loud, online! The interviews that I was a part of in May have been edited and broadcast by Moody Radio. Simply, click on the link included here and listen to a small part of my world. Be blessed! Go to www.primetimeamerica.org, click on "Past Programs" beneath Greg Wheatley's photo, scroll to July 24, and click on "Listen."

Answered Prayers

Ten million thanks for all your prayers. I am back to 100% health and holding all my lovely babies again (make sure to check out the side column to see photos). I took a weeks worth of antibiotics and the infection/pain in my arm is gone! Praise God! The medical crew took an emotional blow with the death of Baby Greg, but we are all hanging together and have an even greater sense of unity and support for each other now. We are all very sad at the loss of Baby Greg, but encouraged to know that Baby Greg is with Jesus. Please continue to pray for his mama. After trialing the 12 hour shifts for a month on the ward, the decision was made to return to 8 hour shifts. I am thankful for this decision as the 12 hour shifts were very draining for me and my fellow nurses. I thank God for the arrival and projected arrival of more ward nurses. Many of you may have heard, but if you have not, my mom will be joining me here in Africa to serve on the Mercy Ship for 1 month. My mom will be working as a ward nurse too! She is scheduled to arrive at the end of August and will be staying through October 4th. Pray for her travel preparations. Thanks again! I love all of you! God bless!

No Longer Ours to Hold

..."Jesus wept." John 11:35...

...We also weep...

...Baby Greg is no longer ours to hold...

...He is with his Papa now...

The Curse

There was family strife, the details are not clear, but harsh hateful words were said. Her mama died, or left, either way, Mama was gone. The new girlfriend came and wanted nothing to do with the previous women's children. The children were abandoned, their father hardened his heart and chose to fulfill the desires of his new women over his commitment to his children. Time passed and his heart softened. He decided to give the children some money for school fees. Meanwhile, the eldest daughter, hurt and looking for the love only a father can give, sought comfort from her boyfriend. She became pregnant. Her father, in a fit of anger and rage, shouted, "may you never hold a child, may your children never live!" Because of his own daughter's "ungratefulness" for his money, this papa cursed his daughter, wishing she would never know the love of a child. Baby Greg's mama sits at the edge of her son's hospital bed, on the Mercy Ship. Years later, with the words of her father's curse still replaying in her mind, she cannot help but fear for Greg's life. She has already lost two small babies and now Greg is barely hanging on. But how can this be, because "the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world." 1 John 4:4 Why would this be happening? Isn't God in control? Baby Greg has come to the ship of "hope and healing..." Where is his healing? Why does Greg struggle so much? Why does Greg's oxygen level suddenly drop and why does he become restless any time people pray over him? We do not understand, but one thing we do know is, "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:12

Update on Jitta Bug

Dear friends and family. Thank you for you praying for OUR patients. Late update, but good news! Jitta Bug went home weeks ago. She is truly a miracle baby! She healed beautifully! I have posted some photos of her in the left column. Thanks for your prayers. I could feel your prayers as I cared for Jitta. Many of you know, my nursing speciality is NOT pediatrics. I love babies, and especially the African babies, as you can tell from my writing and photos, but my nursing expertise is NOT children. I studied pediatric nursing in school and I am trained to safely care for children, but it is not normally my thing. Ill, cranky, precious little weak ones scare the daylights out of me! I love them so much it hurts me to watch them suffer. But, once again, in Africa, things are different. I care for children on a regular basis now. If we have pediatric nurses working, we assign them the young patients, but we do not always have pediatric nurses around. I am becoming accustomed to caring for children and I actually love it. Your prayers are being answered in many ways. My African babies and I send our love!

When Will the White Girl Visit Again?

I followed my African friend down the narrow dirt path. We worked our way farther and farther from the busy market. We followed the tiny path and weaved our way through the village passing pieces of cardboard and tin pieced together; the local houses. I passed scrawny chickens picking at the dirt, tons of chocolate-skin-colored kids playing soccer in the road, and haphazardly observed naked little ones bathing in their plastic buckets. I looked around and noticed men urinating on the side of houses, women cooking over open fires, hair being braided, and children playing. I was off the beaten path, out of the city, and headed to the village of PO PO Beach. Everyone I passed stared at me. Few people in Africa are accustomed to seeing white people, especially where I was now walking. My friend told me I was entering the ghetto, or "crossing the tracks" into "the OTHER side of town." Not that the place I was going was dangerous, but it was remote, not where most white people go. I was in the part of town where white is the color your t-shirt used to be; not a skin color. The stares continued, but instead of keeping my eyes toward the ground, I made eye contact with the people and as soon as I smiled and waved, the cold hard stares broke into huge toothless grins. After rounding one last corner and traversing another muddy pool of stagnate water; we had arrived at our destination. We were at the humble home of Emmanuel, one of the day workers from the ship. Emmanuel and his wife quickly stood from the two plastic lawn chairs they were sitting in, welcomed us, and insisted we sit. They then took their place on the dirt next to us. Reluctant to take a chair from one older than myself, but not wanting to offend my host, I sat on Emmanuel's prised piece of furniture. There were children playing in the dirt across from me. They giggled and quickly looked away as we made eye contact. An elderly women was cooking corn on the cob on a grill, over an open fire. A man walked past carrying gallons of water on his head. The entire village appeared to be going about their business, but they were all very aware of my presence. I then spotted two sets of root beer brown eyes peering at me from behind a tree. I smiled... they ran... it became a game. They would sneak up behind the tree, then the metal post, then closer until I saw them... and they would run away laughing. The crowd playing the game grew. Each time they ran away, they would bring a new young friend. It seemed as if they were almost daring each other to reach the white girl, but they would always run away. I stuck my tongue out at them and winked, they almost fell over with laughter and they ran away again. The game carried on for at least 30 minutes. Eventually, they ran off giggling, snickering, and sticking their tongues out at me. Around the corner from where I was sitting, I could see a group of people assembled in a somber manner. I was told the group had just returned from a funeral. The woman in the center of the group had just buried her husband. I watched in silence, observing the intense mourning of the widow and her family and the strong cultural ties of relations that brought many in the community to visit and just sit with the family. A man carrying a beautiful baby girl walked past where I was sitting. My African friend could not help but notice the way my eyes sparkled when the wee baby came closer. He observed my interest in the baby and called the stranger over and asked if I could the child. Next thing I knew, the child was thrust into my arms and I was privileged to hold that precious baby girl for the next hour as her dad sat behind a tree content as could be even though a strange white girl was holding his baby. After an hour of visiting with Emmanuel and his wife Margret; Margret excused herself to do house work and Emmanuel sent his children to fetch water. I offered to help. The Africans laughed at me, wondering how I could possibly help. I said I would try. My friends said I did not need to help, but they were not going to stop me. I jumped up, grabbed one of the 25 gallon buckets from Emmanuel's children, and I followed them 1/2 mile to the water pump. I mean how hard could it really be to carry water? If the 7-year-olds can do it, I should be able to, right? We reached the pump and started filling the buckets, they filled fast and it was soon time to carry them back. My tour guide promptly lifted the bucket onto her head and was ready to go. I attempted to lift mine, but before I got it off the ground, I saw my African friends behind the nearest building. They quickly came to my side and insisted that they should carry the water. Wanting the real African experience in everything, I heaved the bucket, with help, onto my head, and soaked myself because the cap was not on tight. I balanced the bucket for about 30 seconds and finally admitted my weakness. I do not know how they carry things that are so heavy and odd shaped. I guess my head is not flat enough. With the help of the guys, we made it back to the village with the water. I am going to have to practice a lot more before I am village material! While we were gone, Margret had started washing clothes. She was working so hard, my heart went out to her. I wanted to help lighten her work load for just one day if I could. She had a large basin filled with water. She would put soap on each item of clothing, get it wet, and scrub it on a wash board. I decided to try and help. Margret showed me the basic process involved in washing each item and I went for it. She laughed so hard, watching me try to scrub her clothes. I would not give up, I was determined to get this task and skill down. You rest the washboard on your knees. Then steady it with your hands, by pushing down on the board with your hands and forward on the board with your knees, all while scrubbing the item of clothing in your hands as hard and you can. If it sounds complicated, it is! We are talking an old metal wash board like in the movies. I never was coordinated enough to scrub with both hands. I had to steady the board with one hand and scrub with the other. I wanted to finish the entire load of laundry for Margret, but between the laughter and soap suds that were soaking my pants, I had to turn the task back over to the pro. But, not before everyone in the village saw me and had a good laugh. I sat back down, wet and exhausted. All too soon, the time came for us to return to the ship. I said goodbye to my new friends and assured them I would visit again. A few days later, I ran into Emmanuel on the ship, he said all the neighbors wanted to know when the white girl would visit again. Keep checking the blog to see if the white girl visited again...

Posts Out Of Order & My Health

Make sure to scroll down the blog page to a blog about Off Ship Ministry Sites. Again, things are out of order on my page. I am working as fast as I can to update you on my life here. Please pray for my health at this time as well. Many of you know I had an incredibly bad infection on my arm related to my vaccines for this trip before I came. I have recovered extremely well from that infection, but on Saturday I started to get pain in my arm in the same area where that infection had previously been. I had a high fever and decided to go to the doctor before it got worse. They drew my blood last night and started me on antibiotics again. We are not sure what is going on, but they gave me tonight off. I am supposed to work night shifts Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, so pray for my quick recovery, that nothing serious is going on, and that I will not be scared. Because I tend to get "small, small" concerned when I get sick because I don't want it to be anything serious. Thanks a million. I love all of you so much!

I AM OKAY

Dear friends and family, I apologize for the length of time it has taken me to blog again. I am totally fine, but entirely busy. The change to 12 hour shifts has left me exhausted after each shift and I go directly to bed most nights. On my days off, I have been having adventure after adventure and I have not had the time to write about my ministry and experiences before another one begins. I will work to catch you up on all the things God has been doing here in Africa. If I wasn't such a perfectionist, I could journal faster, but I like to think things through before I write and publish my thoughts. More news coming soon. Thanks again for all your love, prayers, and support.

Baby Greg

It's 3:30 AM, almost everyone is asleep. On the far side of the ward I hear the rhythmic breathing of the exhausted patients. Many have traveled days to reach the hospital ship. They have finally had their life changing surgeries and although they may be experiencing pain, they do not stir because their mental, emotional, and spiritual exhaustion from living in a war torn country have trumped their physical pain. They are out for the night. On the opposite side of the ward, I hear the constant bleeping of the oxygen saturation monitor, the low hum of the ventilator, the bubbling of the humidifier, and the shush of the oxygen tank. Amidst all the noise coming from medical equipment, there is an audible gurgling, hiccuping, and gasping for air that come from five month old baby Greg. Baby Greg rests like a limp rag doll on his bed staring at his humble mobile. His baby mobile made of cris-crossed tongue depressors, string, and tiny beanie babies, sways back and forth above his fragile body. Baby Greg is struggling to live. He is so small. His operation was completed June 16th, but Baby Greg is not healing. Baby Greg's cystic hygroma, (a sac like structure full of fluid and white blood cells) was removed. The grapefruit like mass that stuck out from his neck is gone, but Baby Greg struggles to survive. The Mercy Ship doctors knew if the mass on Greg's neck continued to grow, he would soon suffocate. Medical knowledge told us to operate, but Greg is so small and frail. His breathing is worse now than before. He struggles for every breath. He was intubated in the intensive care unit and made small improvements, but now the progress has ceased. He is not getting better. He has to wear 100% oxygen almost all the time. Without the oxygen, Baby Greg would die. Baby Greg does not have the strength to eat and breath simultaneously. Thus, we put a feeding tube in his tiny belly. Our Baby Greg is handsome and precious, but we do not know what to do. We are limited in our intervention because of lack of supplies and our location. We could attempt to make an airway (trach) in his neck, but the risk of infection is too great and the reality is the Mercy Ship will not be in Liberia forever. Our hearts ache and our heads hurt. We wonder what we have done. Each day the patients and nurses gather in prayer for Baby Greg.... We need a miracle.... We have obeyed God's call to come help the poor, but this... one is never prepared for.... And it would be just too much if the humble mobile above Greg's bed stopped swaying.... PRAY...

Visit to Off Ship Ministry Sites

A few weeks ago, I had the wonderful opportunity to visit and see first hand a number of the ministries Mercy Ships is involved with off ship. It was a privilege to physically travel into the village and bush to observe the outreach my fellow crew members are involved in. I did not realize the variety of programs our crew are involved with. The day trip was incredible and I was able to observe five of our different off ship crew groups in action.

TENEGAR MEDICAL CLINIC RESTORATION PROJECT Early in the morning we loaded the land rover and started our journey toward the remote village of Tenegar. Tenegar is about 1 hour from the ship providing traffic is okay and the roads are not flooded. Tenegar is one of the two locations, off ship, where Mercy Ships is focusing their energy. All the programs we are completing in Tenegar are being duplicated by other Mercy Ship crew members in the village of Royesville. We are working in Tenegar to fulfill a personal request of Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, the President of Liberia. Tenegar suffered incredible damage during the war. Their medical clinic was destroyed like many other buildings all over Liberia. President Sirleaf grew up outside of Tenegar and it was her personal wish and request that we restore that area, specifically the medical clinic. Therefore, our construction team is working with the men and people of Tenegar to rebuild their clinic. As with any of the ministries Mercy Ships is involved in, we wish to train and empower the local people, not just "do it for them". This is true with the construction project. Mercy Ships contacted the men from the area surrounding Tenegar and asked them to volunteer to build the clinic. We are teaching the local men valuable construction skills and also giving them ownership in the project. They will value the clinic far more after sweating and working for it. Mercy Ships provides all the materials and manages the project. One of my friends from Ghana, Charles Awagah is the project team leader along with another man named Karl. The men from the village volunteered for the first few weeks of the project and then once we knew they were committed to the project we decided to pay them for their work. We determined this was fair considering they need to provide for their families and when they are working on the clinic they are not making their normal living. The construction project is going well and the goal is to have it finished this fall. I am hoping to help paint at the clinic on one of my days off.

FOOD FOR LIFE-AGRICULTURE Another project we are working on is community farming in Tenegar. We are training and mentoring the local people to manage their local resources for increased food security. Marcel, a farmer from Holland is the project director. He is using his skills and knowledge about farming for God. He has developed a small scale modern farm and garden in Tenegar near the clinic. Up to this point, the primary crops grown by Africans are chili peppers, rice, bananas, corn, and casava. The land in Africa is lush, a farmer's "dream soil" and its potential has barely been touched. Marcel is teaching the local people about their potential for diet diversity and nutritional completeness. Marcel is currently growing watermelon, cantaloupe, corn, beans, casava, potatoes, peanuts, and some crops just for fun like marigolds. Marcel is determining what can successfully be grown here and the villagers are working alongside him. He is teaching the people important concepts such as resource conservation, the rotation of crops, and the destructive nature of "thrash and burn farming." Teaching in organic soil building techniques along with weed and pest control are also points in his lessons. Marcel has made some incredible garden planters with bamboo. He has designed a triangular bamboo structure with a compost pile in the center of it. The people can dispose of their waste. peels, and such in the compost pile and in return, the land is more tidy and the compost nourishes the roots of the crops grown around it. It is brilliant and so easy for any of the Africans to duplicate. For all my farming friends in Idaho, do you realize how valuable your knowledge is? You thought there was no place on the mission field for you. Want to come to Africa?

WATER FOR LIFE-WATER & SANITATION PROJECT Next time you use your indoor toilet, flush it, wash your hands, or get a drink from the kitchen sink; thank God. Not everyone has the luxury of clean water. Clean water is vital. Many illnesses and infections stem from infected water sources. Mercy Ships is working to reduce the incidence of water related diseases by building new wells and deepening current wells. Many people in Africa walk miles to find water. The water they find is not clean, they have to cook over an open fire, so rarely will they take the time to boil their water and let it cool just to get a drink. Mercy Ships is hand digging new wells. The wells are approximately 40 feet deep. This is hard work and scary as Paul, from England and the project leader describes. "Being in a 40 foot pitch dark hole is freaky!" This is a huge project! Again Mercy Ships is encouraging the members from the community to work alongside us. At times this can be very frustrating as Paul explained. He travels to the well sites each day from the ship and at times finds no one there to work. The day I visited one of the well sites, all the men in the village had disappeared. Only women and children remained, no one new where the men went. As much as Paul and our well diggers were willing to do all the work that day, it defeats the purpose of our work. We are working on teaching the men how to dig and care for their wells so they will be able to maintain them once we leave. Some of our wells have hand pumps, but we are working on creating a system with a rope and bucket, but in which the rope stays sanitary. The wells with pumps are incredibly handy, but not when a small part breaks and the people do not know how to fix it. They then return to walking miles and miles to dirty water sources. The part that breaks most often on the hand pumps is a small belt that costs about $5 USD to replace, but even that is too expensive for the villagers. Therefore, we are not only digging new wells in Tenegar, but we are rehabilitating wells dug by other None Governmental Organizations (NGOs) that are no longer functioning because of small broken parts. We are also working on deepening six wells in the area. Many NGOs come in to these villages, quickly dig wells and leave. They are getting money for each well they dig, so the quality of the well is not always their highest priority. A lot of the wells we come across have been dug during the rainy season. The water table is higher at this time, which means you hit water faster, but the wells dry up in dry season because they have not been dug deep enough. We are coming back to these wells and deepening them.

Another aspect of our Water for Life project is working on building latrines for over 50 different homes. One of the first outhouses or toilets we are building is at the local school to serve as a model for students and community members, so they learn what to do with it. Using a toilet and not going to the bathroom on the side of the road seems like common sense and basic knowledge to us, but not here. We are teaching the people to dispose of their human waste in designated areas so they stay healthier and do not infect their water supply.

STRATEGIC HEALTH INITIATIVES-COMMUNITY HEALTH EDUCATION One main focus of Mercy Ships is to bring health and healing to Liberia. I am working on the ship taking care of people who are already ill. It is a great and rewarding job to help in their healing process, but how much better would it be if the people did not have to get sick? A number of our team members are working in Tenegar with the goal of training 50 people the basics of disease prevention and health promotion principles. We conduct weekly training sessions with chosen, respected people from the small communities surrounding Tenegar and they go home to their village and share the information they have learned. We are teaching about topics such as clean water and waste systems, HIV/AIDS, malaria prevention, hand washing, food safety, first aid, basic hygiene and maternal and child health. By teaching a small number of people who teach others, we are hoping the message on how to stay healthy will spread throughout.

LIBERIA SMILES- DENTAL SERVICES

My dentist has a sign in his office that says "if you ignore your teeth; they'll go away." That is the truth. I look at many toothless smiles here in Liberia. People here do not have basic health care let alone dental care. I have cared for many patients here with intense mouth and facial infections that began because of cavities and tooth infections that were never taken care of. That is why our dental team is here. The local hospital has loaned a wing of their hospital to the Mercy Ships dental team. We are providing basic dental education and treatments such as restorations, extractions, and cleanings. We are currently going into the schools teaching children about oral hygiene and working to train at least two Liberian nationals with the skills to be dental assistants and dental hygiene instructors. Maybe I will have the chance to revive my Spanish tooth brushing rap and use it to teach Liberians how to brush their teeth.

FINAL THOUGHTS The trip to Tenegar was amazing and it was encouraging to see everything God is doing through His people. It does not matter what skill you have or if you think you don't have any skills at all. God does incredible things with willing people. The only ability God is look for is availability. Build that house, pour that cement, plant that crop, feed those cows, plunge that toilet, teach those children, answer that phone, type that letter, or deliver the mail.... Let God use you, in this day, in His special way!